Lyrics

Lost innocence, I cried
My freedom was denied
Hands on the clock won’t move
Every second bruises time
Can’t run away, can’t stay
Can’t go back home, not this way
Every door I ever loved
Turns its face and looks away

They taught me how to swallow screams
Call survival gratitude
If I break, I’m weak, I’m wrong
If I speak, I’m being rude

They’ll call me a liar
Throw me to the fire
Say I’m always to blame
Say pain’s just a game
Can’t be sick, that’s a myth
Do something real, submit
Stop dreaming and kneel
Thank God for this meal

My voice is a loaded gun
But I’m told to keep it safe
Smile pretty for the world
While I rot inside this cage
Every prayer tastes like dust
Every promise rusts with shame
I learned young how to disappear
So no one says my name

If I flinch, they say I’m lying
If I freeze, they say I chose
They rewrite my shattered truth
In words I’ll never own

They’ll call me a liar
Throw me to the fire
Say I’m always to blame
Say pain’s just a game
Can’t be sick, that’s a myth
Do something real, submit
Stop dreaming and kneel
Thank God for this meal

Meanwhile the monster lurks in my room
Breathing out a forbidden doom
Lay still and be silent
Don’t make me get violent
He creeps and he lurks
Dark eyes when he smirks

I learned how to vanish
I learned how to stay small
If I disappear quietly
Maybe I won’t fall
Maybe I won’t feel
Maybe I won’t break
Maybe if I’m nothing
I’ll finally be safe

They’ll call me a liar
Burn me on the pyre
Say I’m always to blame
Say pain’s just my name
Can’t be sick, that’s a myth
Bleed quietly, submit
Stop dreaming and kneel
Thank God for this
Thank God for this

Lost innocence, I cried
But I’m still alive
And that terrifies them
Every time